Stranger in a Strange Land
by Adiva Calandia
Summary: Another of my "Normal among weirdos" stories. Janice Bernsten is a Muggle (though she doesn't know the term) and she's about to go for a wild ride. . . Rating for language, but that won't show up for a while


"Janice, we really ought to stay with the tour group."

"Oh, c'mon, Barb, tell me you're not curious."

Barb shook her head, forehead creased. "Of course I'm curious, but I'm not about to run off and break my neck in a castle that says DO NOT ENTER, UNSAFE in big letters."

Janice brushed her hair behind her ear. "Oh, pshaw. The whole thing looks pretty stable to me. I'm gonna go explore."

"Janice, don't."

"_You_ don't have to come. I'll meet you back at the hotel, okay?" The peroxide-blonde hiked her backpack higher on her back. "I've got a cell phone, and I'll be careful." She set off for the ruins in the distance.

"Janice" -- Barb shot an agonized look after her friend, then back at the tour guide, who was gesturing for the group to move on. The redhead shook her head again and began concocting a story to explain Janice's absence. She did that a lot.

Janice hiked towards the ruins, humming Queen softly. The castle didn't seem to be getting any closer, which was odd. But the farther she traveled towards the ruins, the more something was nagging in her mind. Had she forgotten to do something? No, definitely not. But the tickle stayed in her mind.

Her feet started to drag, as if she were moving through Jell-o. What was going on? This just got weirder by the minute.

Then, with a snap she felt rather than heard, her feet moved normally again, and she was standing at the edge of a forest that had _definitely_ not been there two seconds ago.

She gaped in absolute wonderment for several seconds, then spun around to look behind her; looked back at the forest, and rubbed her eyes. After giving herself another minute to absorb this, she realized she could still see the castle over the trees, looking a lot bigger and less ruined. She started forward again.

Something rustled in the trees. Janice turned and stared anew as a -- horse, she supposed -- came towards her. It was black, with white, staring eyes, and an overall reptilian look. It was very disturbing, but at the same time, oddly beautiful. Janice reached out a hand.

"Well, hello, babe, hey. What the heck are you?"

The horse blinked slowly as she rubbed its nose, then spread wings Janice hadn't noticed. She gasped and backed away a step.

"What _are_ you?" She repeated.

The horse regarded her stonily for a moment, then swept its wings forward and struck her on the head.

It gave a high-pitched whinny as she fell to the ground, then trotted over to her unconscious body and stood guard. Another horse, a few yards away, whinnied in response and took to the air, flying strongly for the castle.

* * *

Hagrid put his tea-cup down with a thump and a clatter. Ron, Harry, and Hermione blinked in surprise.

"Hagrid? What is it?" Asked Hermione. Hagrid was staring out the window and starting to stand.

"It's Tenebrus -- you remember, th' thestral I showed yeh? He's out there."

Harry glanced out the window and saw the equine figure cantering to a halt outside; he wondered for a moment how Hagrid could tell the beasts apart. He stood, as did Ron and Hermione, and followed Hagrid. Ron and Hermione looked bewildered, and Harry had to remind himself that they still couldn't see the thestrals.

Hagrid was stroking Tenebrus and whispering to him. The thestral rubbed his head against Hagrid's chest and seemed to communicat with him, because the gamekeeper straightened and headed back towards his house.

"Hagrid, what's going on?" Asked Ron. Harry watched as Tenebrus took off again.

Hagrid banged into his cabin and came out again with a crossbow. "There's an intruder at th' edge o' th' forest," replied Hagrid, shouldering a quiver of arrows.

"An intruder?" Said Hermione incredulously. "But _Hogwarts, a History_ says that no one can get into the grounds through the forest!"

"Oh, will you be quiet about _Hogwarts, A History_ for once?" Snapped Ron.

"Ron, don't yell at Hermione. But he's right, Herm -- yeh can't believe everything yeh read. I mean, the books say hippogriffs are dangerous, and we all know _that_ ain't true!"

The trio exchanged glances, then followed Hagrid toward the forest. He turned around.

"You three aren't comin' with me, not this time, understan'? It'll be dangerous enough fer me."

"But maybe we could help!"

"No," replied Hagrid firmly. "I've gotta go all th' way through th' forest, and ye're not goin' all that way. Head back up t' th' school."

They grumbled, but eventually agreed and headed back for the castle.

* * *

Something was crashing through the underbrush. With a groan, Janice shifted position and began to awake.

Hagrid swiped at a branch and entered the small clearing where the thestral still guarded the Muggle. Hagrid stared at the woman, especially her jeans, t-shirt, and aviator sunglasses.

"Blimey, Tilen, what've you got there?" He crouched beside the woman, who was beginning to stir. "Miss?"

Janice opened her eyes and blinked. Her eyes widened when she saw the hairy bulk of Hagrid leaning over her. She took a deep breath and opened her mouth to scream.

Tilen -- the thestral -- kicked her gently in the head, and she relaxed into unconsciousness again. Hagrid shook his head. "Ye're probably right, though. C'mon." He lifted the woman and placed her gently on Tilen's back, propping her against his neck. A small trickle of blood on her cheek caught his eye, dripping from a small gash on her temple. He gave Tilen a stern look. "I think yeh were a bit hard wi' that last kick."

Tilen gave the unmistakable impression of a shrug, and trotted into the woods, towards the school.

* * *

Janice finally woke up fully a few hours later. A blacksmith had set up shop inside her skull, just behind her eyebrows. She groaned. "What was I drinking last night?"

She opened her eyes and focused on the stone ceiling. But that wasn't quite right. The hotel had white plaster ceiling, didn't it? She could've sworn. . .

The events of the past few hourse began to trickle in. She had left the tour group to explore the ruins. . . And some had leaned over her -- in the forest that had appeared out of nowhere, with the black scary horse with huge wings --

"Where _am_ I?" She wondered aloud.

"The hospital wing of Hogwarts school," answered a kind old voice.

Janice turned her head to the speaker -- an old man with long silver hair. He smiled at her over half-moon glasses. "How are you feeling, miss?"

"Um. . . Okay, I guess," Janice replied, disconcerted. "I've got a doozy of a headache, but otherwise. . . ."

"Ah, yes, but that's to be expected," replied the man. "You took a nasty crack to the head."

Janice nodded uncertainly and pushed herself to a sitting position. Her head gave an extra throb or two, and she winced. The man continued as her eyes focused on him again. "My name is Albus Dumbledore, headmaster of this school."

Janice stuck out a hand. "Janice Bernsten. Nice to meet you." They shook, and she was struck by the wiry strength in his hand. "Listen, where is this school?"

"Hogwarts? Scotland, of course."

"Um, cool." Janice massaged her eyebrows with the heels of her palms. "Look, this isn't getting anywhere. I hope you don't mind if I ask some questions."

"I would hardly be a teacher if I did," replied Dumbledore. "Ask away."

Janice chuckled. "Okay. First -- how did I get up here? Last I remember, I was in a forest headed for a ruined castle. At least, I thought it was ruined -- but it wasn't. . ." She rubbed her head again.

"Ah," said Dumbledore, ignoring the second half of the remark. "Our gamekeeper, Rubeus Hagrid, found you in the woods around the school. You were lucky -- there are some dangerous animals in there."

"Like those -- horses?" She asked hesitantly. "I thought they had wings. But isn't that a physical impossibility? It'd mean they had six limbs."

Dumbledore sighed. "You saw the thestrals, then? In that case" -- he turned towards the portraits that covered the walls -- "you may move again."

A tall young man in a doublet and hose stretched and exclaimed, "Thank God! I was getting a cramp." All over the ward, the paintings were moving into more comfortable positions. Janice's jaw dropped. The young man leaned on the frame of his picture and glared at her. "Oh, do shut your mouth, you look like a fish."

Janice theatrically put her index finger to her chin and shut her mouth with a click. Dumbledore smiled. "Hogwarts, Miss Bernsten, is a school for young wizards and witches."

Janice turned towards him. "You mean, these paintings -- what you teach -- is magic?" Dumbledore nodded. Janice gaped, then burst into a grin. "I knew it! I _knew_ magic existed! Oh my God, this is so cool!"

Dumbledore laughed softly, then his expression grew serious. "Unfortunately, now that you've seen this, our Statute of Secrecy says that you must have your memory wiped. We cannot risk you revealing the prescence of our world to society at large.

Janice's face fell. "You -- I can't remember this?"

"According to our laws, yes. But" -- his eyes twinkled -- "I have been known to bend the rules on more than one occasion, and I for one would rather you kept your memory intact. You may be just the person I have been looking for.

"You see" -- He leaned forward a bit -- "recently, one of our greatest enemies returned, a Dark wizard called Voldemort. He was in power over twenty years ago, but was stopped, finally, sixteen years ago. Now he is coming back into power.

"Previously, he and his followers would kill non-magical people -- like yourself -- for sport. Now that he is back, I think that wizards and Muggles must band together to defeat him."

Janice sat thoughtfully for a few moments, digesting this. Finally, she looked up and said, "And you want me to help band you -- us -- together?"

"Exactly."

Janice blew out her breath noisily. "I see."

"What would be ideal," continued Dumbledore, "would be for you to stay on at the school for a time -- to observe and learn about us, and so that we can learn about you. Will you be missed if you disappear for a few months?"

"I guess not," she said slowly. "I'll need to get in touch with a few people, but that'd be easy enough, I think."

"Then you'll do it?"

Janice grinned. "A chance to see real magic? A chance to get away from work for a few months? A chance to hang out with people with cool accents? Just _try_ and stop me."


End file.
